Showing posts with label Idiocracy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Idiocracy. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Horse pucky ...

It's a damn shame that Big Brown wasn't able to seal the deal at the Belmont Stakes on Saturday. Lord knows that the horse racing industry could have used the pick-me-up that the first Triple Crown winner in three decades could have supplied. But one reason why most of the sport's fans and insiders aren't rending their garments over Big Brown's defeat is the fact that his butthead of a trainer also lost. And Rick Dutrow keeps finding more and more ways to make the world hate his ever-loving guts.

First it was Dutrow's shady record, both as a horse trainer and as a human being. He brazenly administered steroids to his horses, Big Brown included, even though the practice is banned in several states and frowned upon in others. Then, during the days leading up to the Belmont, Dutrow put Joe Namath to shame by calling the Triple Crown a "foregone conclusion". And now, as the bad taste of Big Brown's Belmont run remains bitter in many people's mouths, Dutrow has taken the always-popular tack of throwing his jockey, Kent Desormeaux, under the bus:

"I don't want to hurt anyone, especially Kent," Dutrow told The Associated Press on Tuesday morning in his barn at Aqueduct. "But I still don't understand what happened. I don't see the horse with a problem, so I have to direct my attention toward the ride. That's all I can come up with."


Desormeaux - the jockey who rode Big Brown to convincing victories at the Kentucky Derby and Preakness Stakes, by the way - is pretty much universally hailed as acting in the best interests of his horse by easing him up at the end of the Belmont. That gesture, done for a horse that Desormeaux thought may have been injured, potentially could have saved Big Brown's life had he been hurt - not to mention protect the millions the bay colt will generate as the most popular stud since John Holmes. So for Dutrow to blame the jockey for the horse's defeat is, well, pretty dumb.

After slamming Desormeaux, Dutrow magnanimously went on to say that he would have no objection to the jockey taking the mount for Big Brown's next race. One would hope that Desormeaux would do the honorable thing - and tell Dutrow what he can do with his job. Something that involves matter that emerges from the other end of the horse.

Friday, January 11, 2008

The mayor has no clothes! (Or, paging Hugh Hefner!)

This morning I came across the story of Carmen Kontur-Gronquist and the efforts to oust her from her job as the mayor of Arlington, a town of 524 that sits on the south side of the Washington-Oregon border. Until now Arlington's biggest claim to fame has been as the birthplace of former Tonight Show bandleader Doc Severinsen, but Doc has nothing on the story that has thrust Mayor Kontur-Gronquist from her position. Seems that there are those in the town who object to the content of her MySpace page - namely, the presence of sexy photos of the good mayor showing off her impressive physique in her bra and panties. The complainers think Kontur-Gronquist has brought shame to their community by having the pictures (which were posted before she assumed the office) there for all of the Internets to see, and they want her to resign - or to be recalled if she declines to go, which she has so far done on the grounds that she has done nothing wrong. Which she hasn't, especially compared to some of the yahoos who pass as politicians these days.

But if Kontur-Gronquist is ousted as mayor, I guarantee you that it won't take long for Hugh Hefner to shoot her an e-mail containing an offer to pose for Playboy, either the magazine or the Web site, in her underwear or far less. She's right up their alley, and not just because of her buffed-out body (I would guess she has taken part in fitness competitions in the past). A mayor targeted for actions that have less to do with her official duties than her private life? Heck, this wouldn't even be the first fired mayor Playboy has done a pictorial on!

Here are two of the photos in question. (Kontur-Gronquist's MySpace page is still up but is currently restricted to friends only, and I don't think she'll be adding new friends any time soon.) They're PG-13, but they may be NSFW depending on where you're employed, so enter at your own risk.

http://www.urbangrounds.com/images/Carmen_Kontur-Gronquist.jpg

http://www.urbangrounds.com/images/Carmen_Kontur-Gronquist_2.jpg

You'll notice, by the way, that both photos were taken on a fire truck; the mayor's day job is as the executive secretary of the Arlington Fire Department, and I'm sure those guys don't mind about the pics!