I've heard of the Nazi party, but this is ridiculous ...

And we think we have sex scandals in this country. Over in Britain and Europe, they know how to get things done - and that's not necessarily a compliment. Actually, in the case of a elder English gent named Max Mosley, it definitely isn't. Mosley is the head of the Formula One racing circuit - or, at least, he is as of this very moment. How long that will last remains to be seen now that the 67-year-old Mosley has been photographed taking part in an orgy that involved ladies of the evening. But that's not the "best" part of the story - after all, orgies on the other side of the pond usually don't make that much of a stir. But if the orgy included prostitutes dressed as Nazi guards - well, that could be a bit of a problem.

As you can imagine, the clamor for Mosley to resign his post has been loud and fierce. And adding fuel to the fire is the fact that Mosley's father, in addition to having a nerdy first name (Oswald!), was the U.K. leading fascist back in the day, not to mention a running buddy with one Adolf Hitler. So one could look at Max's antics as being more than just a bad joke. Don't be surprised if Mr. Mosley races for the exit real soon. Hope the ride was worth it.

He's bringing sexy back!

It seems that Ralph Fiennes may have met his match. The AP reports today about the prowess of Akili the gorilla, who resides at the Artis Zoo in Amsterdam. Akili was brought in from a German safari park to give some pick-me-up the social life among the other primates. (Translation: the ladies weren't having babies because they weren't getting any from the other guys.) In comes Akili (no pun intended), and within six months all three of the female gorillas are either with child or have had child.

There's no joke here - just a whole bunch of jealousy.

NOTE: Click here for the page on the Artis Zoo's Web site about Akili and his, er, success rate. Yeah, it's in Dutch, but I can give you the basic translation: Dude's got game.

WTF has gotten into Ralph Fiennes all of a sudden?

I mean, really, what's going on here? Suddenly the mild-mannered British actor is challenging George Clooney and Colin Farrell for the title of Hollywood's Busiest Stud. First there was the incident in February in which Fiennes apparently joined the "mile high club" with the help of a willing-and-able flight attendant during a Qantas flight from Darwin to Mumbai - where, in a crazy-meets-crazy situation, he was to give a lecture on safe sex practices (Fiennes allegedly performed sans protection on the plane - and then later covered himself for a second tryst that night in her hotel room.) Now comes word from the city of Bruges, Belgium, where Fiennes is shooting a film, that he was spending a very late night frolicking nude at the pool of a swanky hotel with four equally nude young ladies. The partying was such that hotel guests were awakened at 5 a.m. by all of the noise. Of course, there's a chance that no sex was going on at all this time around. Maybe it was good clean fun. Or maybe a World Series trophy will fly out of my butt.

Dude, this is not how Oscar-nominated actors behave. (Wait a minute ... Peter O'Toole ... Richard Burton ... Richard Harris ... never mind.) This has all the earmarks of a mid-life crisis for the 44-year-old Fiennes, though he's already had a colorful love life. He was once married to the luscious English actress Alex Kingston before dumping her for another hot British Babe, Francesca Annis, who is 18 years older than Fiennes. They were together for more than a decade. And there had been recent rumors that Fiennes was dating Ellen Barkin, So obviously he's no slouch when it comes to the carnal arts. Still, he should tone it down a notch, lest he be tagged with the male whore label. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

NOTE: Oh, the film that Fiennes is making in Belgium between sexual conquests? One of his co-stars is the aforementioned Colin Farrell. One wonders what he must be thinking right now.